


For Tommy

by pirateghost



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Deadinnit, Hopeful Ending, Sad Ranboo (Video Blogging RPF), ranboo goin through it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 02:15:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29851041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pirateghost/pseuds/pirateghost
Summary: ranboo's thoughts after tommy's death
Relationships: Ranboo & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 38





	For Tommy

**Author's Note:**

> i got kinda sad so heres a ranboo sob story :P

Ranboo didn't know what changed other than the fact Tommy was no longer around to curse everyone to hell and back. It was every other day except with the cursed knowledge that he wouldn't be back, not for now and probably not for a long time. The server collectively shared grief, showing their mourning alone or with groups. People mourned. Ranboo didn't think they deserved to, not himself, not anyone but the things that gave Tommy the slightest joy. He had a feeling all that joy was already gone, crushed, burnt, deceased. 

He held a deep guilt that boiled inside of him. Crying won't solve anything but more pain and maybe the slightest bit of satisfaction. Tear stained tracks were already dug into his cheeks leaving them scarred and ugly, raw and bloody, he couldn't help but think that in a way he deserved it. Ranboo wondered when the last time Tommy cried with deep, genuine emotion. He wonders who last heard a wailing sob from the boy who's lived far too much. He hoped Dream didn't drive that pain out of him, but he hoped Sam heard every plea the boy let out. Nightmares plagued him at night, imaging the screams. Sickeningly, he prays Sam lives through his mistakes for a while.

Tubbo tried so desperately to ignore the statutes and his late friends dusty, unused house. Deny his old friend was no longer with the living and instead lived in Snowchester. Ranboo didn't leave his side, no matter the words Tubbo threw at him, he waited until the truth hit him. 

It was an unbearable pain, Ranboo imagined. It came during the night while he read the torn books, while the snow swirled outside with no care. Tubbo screamed, wailed, screeched. His best friend was dead and there was hardly anything he could do but accept it the way it is. Tommy was unjustly murdered and Tubbo wanted to kill whoever took that sunshine away. 

They stayed up all night through the morning and afternoon picking flowers, building a small place of remembrance. A bench was placed before it. Ranboo had a feeling that he and Tubbo weren't the only ones sitting on the rusty bench. If he tried enough, Ranboo could still hear Tommy, asking of the moon and talking about crime. If he tried hard enough, he was still alive and warm. 

Later, he ran into Puffy. She held herself better than he has ever seen before, stronger, scarier. He knew she felt remorse for the same reasons he did, for doing nothing when they could've done something. He understood her and that's why he was angry. More guilt racked through his body. Puffy didn't deserve this, but neither did Tommy.

He left her before she could make any more false promises; fail him too. 

\- 

A week went by and Ranboo couldn't be bothered to go back to his snowy house, the travel was too far but someone needed to tell the Arctic residents before they found out in the wrong way. Tubbo offered to be the one to hold his hand as he told Techno and Philza. They left in the middle of the night, a random burst of energy from the two let them pursue the venture early. 

In the back of his mind he wondered how the men would react. Philza was a lost cause to Ranboo, but Techno was different. He was scared for the brute. Techno had the habit of letting his guard down for a few seconds around Tommy, letting what the man was truly feeling out; Ranboo could never miss the fond look he gave Tommy.

As expected, the news did not receive tears. Taking Tubbo with shaky hands, they ignored the sudden wails that came from the cottage. 

While the other boy slept through the night the news seemed to finally hit Ranboo again. This time that angry glow of rage was put out by a soaking sorrow. A slow realization washed over his being, one day he’ll forget. Tommy may never be forgotten but deep down he knows one day he’ll forget about the flower. One day, he will forget why the thought of Tommy was so painful, he’ll forget why the ache was even there.

That night he burnt himself. Hunching over a pile of papers, wet tears getting lost on torn skin and messy writing. The pen he used bled out, giving its all into Ranboo's desperate words. Writing down memories with the boy, he wrote, pouring his soul into the tiniest of details and emotions, he wrote. He wrote for Tommy and for himself. Ranboo knew he couldn't let himself forget. Trying to dig for more, obsessively thinking of anything he forgot. 

He knew some things were gone. They were already lost.

The pile of pages became much more than faint memories, but became something Ranboo wanted to remember in relation. He wrote of how unfair this world has been ever since he's been in it, how cruel humanity is just because it's how they are. How much he misjudged Tommy at first and what he'd do to change his mind early on and convince himself to help the boy. Ranboo wrote with fury leading him how unfair of a deck life had given Tommy, how neglectful everyone was when it came to him. 

In his mind, he wondered if Tommy would forgive them and let it all be water under the bridge. If Tommy would let him, if he allowed it, Ranboo would have already raised hell.

Something in his mind told him that the boy probably would forgive everyone. 

This world hurt, but without Tommy, it hurt even more. 

After spilling his heart out he went to sleep with the thought of Tubbo who breathed and snored through his small house. He won't fail Tommy again, he will keep Tubbo safe till the end of time.

For Tommy.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you <3


End file.
